Growing Up is About Watching the Sunrise
Alright guys, I’m not going to waste a whole bunch of time apologizing for not writing lately because there’s so much to tell you! Clearly the whole “shorter more often” thing isn’t really my style and that didn’t work. It may be easier to read and maybe even more enjoyable, but I feel like I don’t tell you everything I want to with that. (Ok so I didn’t give it that much of a chance but…whatever.)
It’s summer here, and I feel like a cat in so many ways. I sleep all day, spend the waking hours of night chasing after various laser lights and continuing to expand my knowledge of the public transportation system, and drinking milk and feeling sick afterwards. I don’t think cats use public transportation…but they seem to be able to get anywhere so maybe they have something similar. It’s warming up quite unpleasantly lately, and I think the fan that I used to worry would tear out the ceiling and shooting star into the opposite wall seems to be losing power. I no longer have dreams about being lost in a farm of windmills, anyways. It feels so far away from Christmas that when I remember it’s that time of year on a few rare occasions it almost annoys me. Not only have I not bought anything for anyone I love, but I haven’t said “Happy Holidays” to a single person, nor had anyone say such a thing to me. In fact, I’ve kind of had an ingrained sense of excitement that fourth of July is coming soon. Fireworks! What??? This summer season thing is messing with my mind. Lauti told me they actually have fireworks on Christmas usually anyways. How exciting…but it doesn’t physically fit in my mind. Neither do half of the images on cigarette cartons here, so I guess things are just strange.
^^This one says that half of smokers die of tobacco…but there’s a picture of a bandaged foot. I don’t get it. (Ok, guys, I’m not dumb. I know it’s a toe tag. But I still think there should be two feet….or maybe a picture of a dead person would be a bit more effective. Idk. I was a Marketing major…so stop making fun of me for not understanding it! My blog’s been posted for like two minutes and I’ve already got three messages telling me it’s a foot with a toe tag. Tranquila!)
Ok so I’m being really random (don’t even try to figure out how my mind works; just go with it) and just making this post ages longer so I’ll start talking about something you actually care about: School!
If you are one of my lucky friends on facebook you’ll have already read that I finally officially changed my major. I’m no longer going to study Business Marketing. I still want to get my MBA but I figured that I don’t really need an undergrad in business to do that, even though it might be easier. I am getting tired of the Business school’s stupid regulations on what I can transfer in and how hard they’ve been to work with in my double major from abroad, plus, I just find the major I switched to more interesting. It actually reinvigorates me and makes me want to study. To be honest, I’ve been bored of school since the tenth grade, I didn’t really want to go to university but there wasn’t anything else productive I could have been doing…it was the next logical option. That’s why I never go to class, I never study, and I get mediocre grades. I’ve been thoroughly bored. We’ll see if this new major helps! It’s Natural Resources, Recreation and Tourism with a concentration in Global Tourism….so Global Tourism pretty much. What is that? Well a lot of work. I will have to do an internship and an undergrad thesis (ewww) and it requires at least a semester abroad. But it’s more tailored to what I think I want to do when I graduate and it has interesting classes that I think I’m more likely to attend. I still have yet to find a true passion, but I’m getting closer.
^^RamWeb Official! 🙂
Another major decision I’ve made lately is that I want to go traveling. The original reason that I cancelled my whole summer trip around South America was because I didn’t anticipate spending so much money on life here and extra costs of my program. Now I think I can do it. I met some people and found some websites and travel communities and I feel like it’s totally possible. I’m not going to post all of the details here on my blog because I’ve already talked to most of you back home about it and you think I’m crazy. Haven’t you learned yet that I AM crazy? Plus, you worry about me too much already and I’m just fine. 🙂 So if you’re really curious then ask me about it, but be prepared and know that I have closed the application for advice… There may never be another opportunity for this in my lifetime and I know I will regret not going.
It was a tough decision because I have such great friends here. I don’t want to leave them one bit and I know my summer would be amazing if I stayed. That means there’s a lot I’ll miss out on by going traveling, but then again I’d miss out a lot by not going–I just don’t know what I’d be missing out on. It was the same with the decision to go to Argentina, and I went through a similar dilemma: leave my friends behind to go have adventure and new experiences or stay and feel comfortable and loved? I promise to be safe though and I love you guys!
Talking about how great of friends I’m making here makes me think about things back in the States. I’ve been really struggling with keeping up with everyone there lately and fighting a lot with my closest friends. It’s like a secondary type of culture shock kind of. I love everyone back home dearly but seeing things on facebook or hearing news from back home sometimes makes me feel left out and jealous. Not only can I not share what’s going on in their lives so easily anymore, but it’s also impossible to describe my life down here well enough for them to understand it. I can tell them about all of my new friends but they still can’t really know what it’s like to go have the most delicious ice cream ever with Sol while she talks about how unlucky it would be to die by a dead person falling on you or to see Lau laugh at himself as he tells me to “get off” the “truck” so he can pull into his postage stamp garage. I have inside jokes with them now, and my friends back in Colorado have inside jokes without me. The reason we are all friends isn’t because of the times we spend together, I know, but the fact that we can spend any time together and make it fun. It’s still hard though. I feel like I have two lives now and I can’t continue to try and maintain both of them; I have to let the weeds grow in my old one so that I can water the new plants here and that is extremely hard for me. Stress